Loss is painful. Grief is challenging.

In fact, sometimes the whole loss and grief process can seem like a solo, unassisted climb of Mount Everest.

Personally, I’ve hiked some mountains, but I haven’t actually “climbed” any (where you need serious gear, equipment, ropes, etc.). Climb Mount Everest? Nope. Never even entered my mind.

Everest is so far beyond my puny abilities and skills that even the thought of it is laughable. All my personal strength would be only a drop in the bucket of what’s required.

Losing a loved one – or losing several (or even many) loved ones – is shocking, painful, and traumatic. Once the shock waves begin, they can go on and on. The aftershocks are limitless and scary. One loss leads to another, and another, and then yet another.

Our personal losses grow in front of our eyes, rising higher and higher. Our Everest keeps getting bigger, taller, and even more insurmountable. We can’t see the summit – not even close. All is shrouded in clouds and mist.

No one can tell us how hard this will be for us. No one can tell us how long it will take.

All this is daunting. This journey is hard. Arduous. Exhausting.

This is uncharted territory for us. New terrain. A new and foreboding wilderness. We’ve been through difficulty and loss, but not like this. Every mountain is different.

On top of all this, a stark loneliness emerges from somewhere deep inside us. Others have traveled here, but this is not their loss. This is our loss – ours alone.

Is it any wonder we get overwhelmed at times?

Is it any surprise we feel tired, drained, and even exhausted?

Is it any wonder we experience a loneliness like no other?

It feels like an Everest. We can wonder if we have what it takes.

What do we do with all this?

First of all, breathe.

Take a moment. Breathe in deeply through your nose. Hold it for a few seconds. Now breathe out slowly through your mouth. Again.

Keep breathing deeply for a minute or two.

Second, tell yourself the truth. Say the following out loud: “This is HARD.”

Say it again. “This is HARD.”

Keep breathing. Say it again.

Third, tell yourself some more truth: “I can only take one step at a time.” 

Breathe. Say it again. “I can only take one step at a time.”

All journeys are taken one step at a time. In life and grief, there are no leaps forward. There are no skip-overs or shortcuts.

Breathe. “I can only take one step at a time.”

Fourth, remind yourself of one more truth: “I cannot do this by myself.”

Breathe. Say it again. “I cannot do this by myself.”

You know this. That’s why you’re reading this email.

There are many, many people on this grief journey. All our losses are different, but we have much in common. We have a sort of shared loneliness.

Keep breathing. “I cannot do this by myself.”

Three simple truths. Embrace them. Say them out loud.

“This is hard. I can only take one step at a time. I cannot do this by myself.”

And don’t forget to breathe.

Perhaps this email raises some questions for you. Please feel free to ask.

Yes, we’re lonely, but we are far from alone. Thank goodness.

The LORD makes firm the steps of the one who delights in Him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with His hand. (Proverbs 27:23-24)

Question: What Everest do you sense you are facing? Feel free to comment and share.

0 Shares

Get My Free Ebook

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Get My Free Ebook

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Get My Free Ebook

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Get My Free Good Grief Mini-Course

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for instructions for accessing your mini-course.

Download A Free Excerpt

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Free Excerpt

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Download A Free Excerpt

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Download A Free Excerpt

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Get My FreePDF:

8 Tips for Handling Grief and the Holidays

You will also receive Gary’s monthly newsletter and other updates. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Get My Free Ebook

GRIEF: 9 Things I Wish I Had Known

 

You will also be added to Gary's Insider Group allowing you to receive regular updates on healing from loss.

 

You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Get My Free Ebook

GRIEF: 9 Things I Wish I Had Known

 

You will also be added to Gary's Insider Group allowing you to receive regular updates on healing from loss.

 

You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.

Read a Free Excerpt

 

Enter your email in the form, and a free excerpt from Gary's Grief Walk book will be sent to your inbox. You will also be added to Gary's Insider Group allowing you to receive his weekly updates on healing from loss. You'll know what he's writing currently, get first glimpses of new books, and be presented with opportunities to make a difference for other grieving hearts.

Please check your inbox for an email from Gary.

Get My Free Ebook

GRIEF: 9 Things I Wish I Had Known

 

You will also be added to Gary's Insider Group allowing you to receive regular updates on healing from loss.

 

You can unsubscribe at any time.

Thank you! Check your email for a link to download your free ebook.