Christmas is upon us. It’s no secret the holiday season is extremely difficult for those of us who are grieving.
Thinking back…
This year has been tumultuous. We all want to see 2020 disappearing in our rear view mirror. We’ve lost so much.
The losses of 2020 have piled up. We’ve lost routines, jobs, and finances. We’ve lost a sense of predictability, stability, and safety. We’ve lost loved ones. We’ve lost life as we knew it.
We’ve endured upheaval and uncertainty. We live in an atmosphere of anxiety, fear, distrust, division, and unrest. Anger, bitterness, and even hatred have become commonplace.
And here we are, on Christmas Eve.
Looking back, we wince and weep.
Looking forward, perhaps we hope for better. Our losses, however, can condition our hearts to be wary and skeptical.
So allow me to share my Christmas wish for myself. Call them “Christmas Affirmations,” if you will. Perhaps your heart will resonate with some of these things. Perhaps you’ll even find a few things you want to embrace along with me.
Amid a world of loss and pain, I will give myself permission to hurt and to grieve.
Amid all the negative messages, I will guard my heart and seek to be more loving than ever before.
Amid the fear, anger, and hatred, I will relentlessly pursue peace, wisdom, and understanding.
Amid an environment of accusations, suspicions, and name-calling, I will be quick to listen, slow to speak, and quick to forgive.
Amid a world of uncertainty, I will be a kind and compassionate hope-giver.
Amid a life of grief, obstacles, and challenges, I will overcome adversity and use pain and grief as fuel for good, and help others do the same.
Amid a world desperately in need of hope and healing, I will continue to heal, grow, and become a difference-maker for good, and invite others to join me in the difference-making journey.
Thinking farther back…
I think back to the first Christmas. It was a time of political upheaval and uncertainty. Economically, things weren’t good. Problems, unrest, fear, and anger were everywhere.
Amid such a world, a stunning, unexpected story unfolds.
As a result of a government mandate, a socially-isolated, economically challenged young couple journey 90 miles on foot to a small town to be registered for a census. The young woman, most likely in her mid-teens, is pregnant and goes into labor.
They desperately search for a place to stay, but the little town is already busting at the seams and has nothing to offer.
Later that evening, a child is born. His first set of clothes are rags. His first bed is an animal feed trough.
Meanwhile, a group of shepherds on a hillside outside of town are suddenly stunned by the appearance of angels. Amid the deep dark of night, they are drenched in heavenly light. Even more stunning is the message the shepherds are given.
“Do not be afraid. I bring you good news which is for all people. Today, a Savior has been born to you. He is Christ, the Lord. You will find this baby wrapped in rags, lying in a feed trough. Glory to God, and peace to those on whom His favor rests.”
At a time of unrest and uncertainty – “Do not be afraid.”
At a time when bad news reigned and the power brokers exerted control – God speaks to a motley group of shepherds and says, “I bring you good news.”
At a time when frustrated, angry, wounded people were desperately needing hope – a history-changing baby was quietly born in obscurity, “wrapped in rags, lying in a feed trough.”
Strange. Backwards. Upside down. Amazing.
Looking forward…
Put simply, tons of terrible, nasty, awful, and painful stuff has taken place this year. It’s time for something different.
It’s time for some light to shine amid this present darkness.
It’s time to hear again the angelic message. No matter how things appear, “Do not be afraid.”
It’s time for “good news.”
More light. Less fear. Good news. Hope.
I wish you a blessed, meaningful, and peaceful Christmas and holiday season.
Have a question or comment? Please feel free to share!
Amazing how long l have searched for your kind of support and help for walking along the journey of grief.
Thank you in advance for your book’s to help us understand ourselves in the process.
Hi Rhonda. Thanks for sharing, and for your support and encouragement. I’m so glad we’re on this journey together. Good traveling companions can make all the difference. Blessings to you…
Hi Gary
I just lost my daddy on June 8,2020 to Covid19.My best and only REAL friend I’ve ever had.I ran across your book and had a sample sent and I can barely see the words,but its ALL the feelings I’m having.I’m ordering a copy today and I hope and pray I find a way through this extreme sadness.its unbearable..thank you,
Marcy
Hi Marcy. I’m so sorry about your dad. That dad-daughter connection can be so, so deep. Please be kind to yourself. And I will be praying – in fact, I’m praying now. Blessings to you…
Hi Gary,
This is Patti K and I am grieving for Bob, my spouse,and Andy ,my God son. I keep thinking I should have done more for both of them. I just didn’t pay attention enough.
Hi Patti. I’m so sorry about Bob and Andy. Two massive losses. I’m also sorry about the guilt and regret too. If it helps any, most of us know we could have done “better” somehow. All of us have regrets, I think – and many of us tussle with grief too. Please release whatever guilt you can. Guilt tends to weigh us down and keep us from loving others and honoring those we’ve lost like we could. Please be kind to yourself – and please feel free to reach out anytime…
I didn’t want Christmas to be so sad I wanted some joy there after six months. I plannned singing duets and special gift give away. My husbands Santa suit was given to my nephew so he appeared there. I wanted to switch the tone.
Hi Phurst. Thanks so much for sharing this! Wonderful. Way to go! I’m proud of you. Blessings to you, and Happy New Year!
Well sai d.
Thank you so much! Needed this today; very helpful.
Hi Marge. Thanks for taking the time to comment and to encourage me. I so appreciate it. A blessed 2021 to you, Marge…
Thank you and Merry Christmas, Gary. And to your loved ones. Stay safe and healthy.
Hi Jocelyne. Thank you! Merry Christmas (belated!) and Happy New Year to you and yours!