Life is full of upsets.
One dictionary defines “upset” as “an unexpected, worrisome occurrence.” Another definition reads, “the state of being turned upside down or over.”
I’m in the middle of an upset. Perhaps you are too.
Uh oh…
At the beginning of this month, our 12-year-old son Aaron went in for an appendectomy. Everything went well. Until a few days later.
He spiked a fever that wouldn’t go away. We got antibiotics. Things got better for a few days. Suddenly his temp skyrocketed, and we found ourselves back in the ER.
I’m sitting beside Aaron’s bed now, glancing over my laptop up to watch him mess with a Rubik’s Cube. We’re on Day 12 of our hospital stay.
Apparently, Aaron bled internally sometime after surgery. The roaming blood in his body cavity acted like a Petri dish for bacteria, and those bad boys seized the opportunity to multiply exponentially, forming pockets of infection all over his abdomen.
He’s on targeted antibiotics. He’s had two big pockets drained. Blood work indicates he’s stable and things are improving. The next 24 hours are important. Either he continues to get better or we’re headed for major surgery to clean out the abscesses spread across the inside of his little torso.
Yes, I think this qualifies as an “upset.” It’s been tough, and more than a little scary.
Life can furnish some pretty big upsets: an illness, a job loss, a relational break-up, a death. These things upend our worlds.
4 ways this upset is affecting us:
1. Aaron’s illness initiated what I call “the wonderings.”
- I wondered what was going to happen.
- I wondered if everything was going to be okay.
- I wondered multiple times if we were on the right track and doing the right thing.
- I wondered what we missed along the way that might have prevented all this.
“Wonderings” are part of processing things well, but we’re not meant to stay there long. Ultimately, we don’t know. Our wonderings are mostly conjecture and speculation. Eventually, we have to deal with what is, and make the best decisions we can based on the info we have.
2. Aaron’s illness has changed things.
There is no longer any routine, as our family knew it. Every night we make a new plan about how to handle the next day and get the other 5 of us where we need to be and when, all the while making sure someone is with Aaron.
- Some upsets change some things. Other upsets change everything.
- Upsets have collateral damage. They affect everyone connected with that person. Relationships change too.
Things aren’t the same. They can’t be.
3. Aaron’s illness has forced us to adapt.
By necessity, we’re doing life differently now. I’m sure there will also be some permanent changes as a result of this. We’re not out of the woods yet, so who knows?
- The longer the upset continues, the more we have to adjust and adapt.
- The more we have to adjust, the more fatigued we become. Chronic adaptation is exhausting.
- Normal has disappeared. If the upset is severe enough, we can even lose sense of who we are.
Adapting takes energy – sometimes a LOT of it.
4. Aaron’s illness has challenged us to trust.
I can’t make my son better. Watching him suffer or waiting for results isn’t my idea of a good time. But I can still love him. And I can do that by listening to and trusting those around me who know more than I do about what’s happening.
- We’re not in control of very much. How we interpret and respond to what happens to and around us determines a lot.
- We’re never fully alone. Someone has tackled this upset before, and many are battling it now. We’re in this together.
Control is an illusion. We were meant to find safe people we can trust.
Peace in the midst of the mess
How is this going to turn out? I don’t know. Hopefully the colors on our Rubik’s cube will line up soon.
I have peace that somehow all is well.
I hope Aaron senses that too.
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Gary, I have written to you about losing my son. That is not going to happen to you. Your son will soon be healed. It’s very scary sometimes what parents have to go through. I am praying for your son to heal quickly. Love to you and your family. Joanie
Hi Joanie. Thank you so much. Thanks for your prayers. He improved so quickly that they just released him and we are home. Now, we need to keep him healing here. I can’t imagine – losing a child. I don’t even want to imagine. We came as close as I want to come to that. I’m so sorry. Praying for you now…
Gary, I have written to you about losing my son. That is not going to happen to you. Your son will soon be healed. It’s very scary sometimes what parents have to go through. I am praying for your son to heal quickly. Love to you and your family. Joanie
Hi Joanie. Thank you so much. Thanks for your prayers. He improved so quickly that they just released him and we are home. Now, we need to keep him healing here. I can’t imagine – losing a child. I don’t even want to imagine. We came as close as I want to come to that. I’m so sorry. Praying for you now…
Praying that God will give all of you the strength,courage, and patience you need each day. His mercies are new every day and sufficient to meet those needs as He continues to bless Aaron with healing.
Howdy Kay. Thank you so much!!!!
Praying that God will give all of you the strength,courage, and patience you need each day. His mercies are new every day and sufficient to meet those needs as He continues to bless Aaron with healing.
Howdy Kay. Thank you so much!!!!
Praying that God will give all of you the strength,courage, and patience you need each day. His mercies are new every day and sufficient to meet those needs as He continues to bless Aaron with healing.
Howdy Kay. Thank you so much!!!!
Gary, thank you so much for sharing the valuable insight you are gaining by trusting God in this “upset”. I’m continuing in prayer for your son during this critical 24 hour period. I’m believing God for a good report. Blessings!
Gary, thank you so much for sharing the valuable insight you are gaining by trusting God in this “upset”. I’m continuing in prayer for your son during this critical 24 hour period. I’m believing God for a good report. Blessings!
Gary, thank you so much for sharing the valuable insight you are gaining by trusting God in this “upset”. I’m continuing in prayer for your son during this critical 24 hour period. I’m believing God for a good report. Blessings!
Gary, I want you to know that your family is in my thoughts and prayers! It sounds like your son is getting better every day! You have been there (and still there!) for me with Chuck’s passing, I hope my prayers help you and yours! Thank you again for all you have done for me! Janice
Hi Janice. Thank you. We really are in this together!!!
Gary, I want you to know that your family is in my thoughts and prayers! It sounds like your son is getting better every day! You have been there (and still there!) for me with Chuck’s passing, I hope my prayers help you and yours! Thank you again for all you have done for me! Janice
Hi Janice. Thank you. We really are in this together!!!
Gary, I want you to know that your family is in my thoughts and prayers! It sounds like your son is getting better every day! You have been there (and still there!) for me with Chuck’s passing, I hope my prayers help you and yours! Thank you again for all you have done for me! Janice
Hi Janice. Thank you. We really are in this together!!!
I am so sorry for what your son and your family has been through. I know how hard it is to see your child struggle. Your feel so helpless. All I can offer are my prayers for your son’s complete recovery and strength for your family to see you through this difficult time.
Hi Jennifer. Thank you. We need those prayers!
I am so sorry for what your son and your family has been through. I know how hard it is to see your child struggle. Your feel so helpless. All I can offer are my prayers for your son’s complete recovery and strength for your family to see you through this difficult time.
Hi Jennifer. Thank you. We need those prayers!
I am so sorry for what your son and your family has been through. I know how hard it is to see your child struggle. Your feel so helpless. All I can offer are my prayers for your son’s complete recovery and strength for your family to see you through this difficult time.
Hi Jennifer. Thank you. We need those prayers!
Gary,
I am so sorry to hear about your precious son’s illness! He as well as your family and all of his health care providers are in my thoughts and prayers.
You have been there for me during so many times of trials and tribulations. It is an honor to have the opportunity to pray for you in a time of need! I pray for a hedge of protection around Aaron, you and your entire family. Mar the Lord reach down and touch and heal his tired little body. I pray that He will wrap His tender loving arms around each of you and that you will each be filled with His peace and love. May the Peace of the Lord always be with each of you.
In Christ’s love,
Norsy
Hi Norsy. Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement. We so appreciate them and you!
Gary,
I am so sorry to hear about your precious son’s illness! He as well as your family and all of his health care providers are in my thoughts and prayers.
You have been there for me during so many times of trials and tribulations. It is an honor to have the opportunity to pray for you in a time of need! I pray for a hedge of protection around Aaron, you and your entire family. Mar the Lord reach down and touch and heal his tired little body. I pray that He will wrap His tender loving arms around each of you and that you will each be filled with His peace and love. May the Peace of the Lord always be with each of you.
In Christ’s love,
Norsy
Hi Norsy. Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement. We so appreciate them and you!
Gary,
I am so sorry to hear about your precious son’s illness! He as well as your family and all of his health care providers are in my thoughts and prayers.
You have been there for me during so many times of trials and tribulations. It is an honor to have the opportunity to pray for you in a time of need! I pray for a hedge of protection around Aaron, you and your entire family. Mar the Lord reach down and touch and heal his tired little body. I pray that He will wrap His tender loving arms around each of you and that you will each be filled with His peace and love. May the Peace of the Lord always be with each of you.
In Christ’s love,
Norsy
Hi Norsy. Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement. We so appreciate them and you!
Thank you for sharing what you’re going through. We, as parents, don’t have to look very hard to find some else in the same situation. It doesn’t make it any easier when we can’t make what is hurting our child go away. We pray and have faith that God will bring healing, whether physical or emotional. Just know that we are and will continue to pray for Aaron and all of you. Love and miss you!
Howdy Elva. Miss you too! Thanks for praying. We are now HOME – and it feels great! Now, if we can just keep him on the healing path…
Thank you for sharing what you’re going through. We, as parents, don’t have to look very hard to find some else in the same situation. It doesn’t make it any easier when we can’t make what is hurting our child go away. We pray and have faith that God will bring healing, whether physical or emotional. Just know that we are and will continue to pray for Aaron and all of you. Love and miss you!
Howdy Elva. Miss you too! Thanks for praying. We are now HOME – and it feels great! Now, if we can just keep him on the healing path…
Thank you for sharing what you’re going through. We, as parents, don’t have to look very hard to find some else in the same situation. It doesn’t make it any easier when we can’t make what is hurting our child go away. We pray and have faith that God will bring healing, whether physical or emotional. Just know that we are and will continue to pray for Aaron and all of you. Love and miss you!
Howdy Elva. Miss you too! Thanks for praying. We are now HOME – and it feels great! Now, if we can just keep him on the healing path…
Peace be yours, each of you, in these hours and days ahead. Praying for your son’s Highest Good in all of this. Praying that as he sleeps his angels will whisper reminders of how beloved he is by God.
Becki
Hi Becki. Thank you very much. May it be so! Blessings to you…
Peace be yours, each of you, in these hours and days ahead. Praying for your son’s Highest Good in all of this. Praying that as he sleeps his angels will whisper reminders of how beloved he is by God.
Becki
Hi Becki. Thank you very much. May it be so! Blessings to you…
Peace be yours, each of you, in these hours and days ahead. Praying for your son’s Highest Good in all of this. Praying that as he sleeps his angels will whisper reminders of how beloved he is by God.
Becki
Hi Becki. Thank you very much. May it be so! Blessings to you…
I believe all is well with your precious boy, too.
Thank you, God, for touching Aaron’s body and bringing healing. I ask that the healing will continue and that there will be no setbacks at all.
In Jesus’ name I pray,
Amen.
Thank you, Kim. I believe so too! Blessings…
I believe all is well with your precious boy, too.
Thank you, God, for touching Aaron’s body and bringing healing. I ask that the healing will continue and that there will be no setbacks at all.
In Jesus’ name I pray,
Amen.
Thank you, Kim. I believe so too! Blessings…
I believe all is well with your precious boy, too.
Thank you, God, for touching Aaron’s body and bringing healing. I ask that the healing will continue and that there will be no setbacks at all.
In Jesus’ name I pray,
Amen.
Thank you, Kim. I believe so too! Blessings…
Gary, I am praying for peace for your family and recovery and restoration to full health for Aaron. Being a parent is a scary place. Especially if we happen to allow the situation to disrupt our walk with our Father. Knowing He IS IN CONTROL helps to keep us from flailing around in our own capabilities, where we will mostly fail. Here’s to keeping your Walk strong. I will pray for that as well. In Christ, Mark
Hi Mark. Thank you! Perfect! Keep up those prayers!
Gary, I am praying for peace for your family and recovery and restoration to full health for Aaron. Being a parent is a scary place. Especially if we happen to allow the situation to disrupt our walk with our Father. Knowing He IS IN CONTROL helps to keep us from flailing around in our own capabilities, where we will mostly fail. Here’s to keeping your Walk strong. I will pray for that as well. In Christ, Mark
Hi Mark. Thank you! Perfect! Keep up those prayers!
Gary, I am praying for peace for your family and recovery and restoration to full health for Aaron. Being a parent is a scary place. Especially if we happen to allow the situation to disrupt our walk with our Father. Knowing He IS IN CONTROL helps to keep us from flailing around in our own capabilities, where we will mostly fail. Here’s to keeping your Walk strong. I will pray for that as well. In Christ, Mark
Hi Mark. Thank you! Perfect! Keep up those prayers!
Gary,
I am sooooo sorry to hear about your son. I am sure this is very scary for your whole family. I am glad that he is doing better and I hope that he will be home very soon. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Fondly,
Janet Ersoy
Hi Janet. Thank you for your concern, prayers, and encouragement. I SO appreciate it!
Gary,
I am sooooo sorry to hear about your son. I am sure this is very scary for your whole family. I am glad that he is doing better and I hope that he will be home very soon. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Fondly,
Janet Ersoy
Hi Janet. Thank you for your concern, prayers, and encouragement. I SO appreciate it!
Gary,
I am sooooo sorry to hear about your son. I am sure this is very scary for your whole family. I am glad that he is doing better and I hope that he will be home very soon. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Fondly,
Janet Ersoy
Hi Janet. Thank you for your concern, prayers, and encouragement. I SO appreciate it!
Gary.. The Rubik’s Cube!! I love that!!! What you just wrote, has hit home AGAIN… You have, and still are, helping me heal since my husbands death.. And now, because of your writings on your very handsome sons medical issues, I am able to try and focus to the positive, on the soon losing of my beautiful home… I’m not in control of that, just like I wasn’t in control the 30 days my husband was in ICU and then passing away…. Another new chapter… I pray that one day my Rubiks Colors will all line up again also.. My thoughts and prayers to Aaron, you, and your family.. And BREATHE…
Hi Charlene. Thanks for much for your encouragement and kind words. They mean more than you know. I’m so sorry about your home. That hurts. I’m certain God has already provided a place for you. I will be a good place. He will make it a good place, and work what He needs to in your heart in the process. Praying for you…
Gary.. The Rubik’s Cube!! I love that!!! What you just wrote, has hit home AGAIN… You have, and still are, helping me heal since my husbands death.. And now, because of your writings on your very handsome sons medical issues, I am able to try and focus to the positive, on the soon losing of my beautiful home… I’m not in control of that, just like I wasn’t in control the 30 days my husband was in ICU and then passing away…. Another new chapter… I pray that one day my Rubiks Colors will all line up again also.. My thoughts and prayers to Aaron, you, and your family.. And BREATHE…
Hi Charlene. Thanks for much for your encouragement and kind words. They mean more than you know. I’m so sorry about your home. That hurts. I’m certain God has already provided a place for you. I will be a good place. He will make it a good place, and work what He needs to in your heart in the process. Praying for you…
Gary.. The Rubik’s Cube!! I love that!!! What you just wrote, has hit home AGAIN… You have, and still are, helping me heal since my husbands death.. And now, because of your writings on your very handsome sons medical issues, I am able to try and focus to the positive, on the soon losing of my beautiful home… I’m not in control of that, just like I wasn’t in control the 30 days my husband was in ICU and then passing away…. Another new chapter… I pray that one day my Rubiks Colors will all line up again also.. My thoughts and prayers to Aaron, you, and your family.. And BREATHE…
Hi Charlene. Thanks for much for your encouragement and kind words. They mean more than you know. I’m so sorry about your home. That hurts. I’m certain God has already provided a place for you. I will be a good place. He will make it a good place, and work what He needs to in your heart in the process. Praying for you…
Gary, is this happening to you with your son? I am so sorry i will pray for you !!
Hi Diane. Yes indeed. Thanks for your prayers!
Gary, is this happening to you with your son? I am so sorry i will pray for you !!
Hi Diane. Yes indeed. Thanks for your prayers!
Gary, is this happening to you with your son? I am so sorry i will pray for you !!
Hi Diane. Yes indeed. Thanks for your prayers!
God bless your family and your son and big hugs!
Thanks Lisa. We really appreciate it!
God bless your family and your son and big hugs!
Thanks Lisa. We really appreciate it!
God bless your family and your son and big hugs!
Thanks Lisa. We really appreciate it!
I am so very sorry that your little boy and the entire family is under seige and frightened as you also hold hope. All of you are on my prayer list.
Hi Mary. “Under siege.” Indeed – that’s exactly how it feels, and how it is. Thanks for your prayers. Thank goodness we are victorious in Christ. Pray that we experience Him in the midst of all this. Blessings…
I am so very sorry that your little boy and the entire family is under seige and frightened as you also hold hope. All of you are on my prayer list.
Hi Mary. “Under siege.” Indeed – that’s exactly how it feels, and how it is. Thanks for your prayers. Thank goodness we are victorious in Christ. Pray that we experience Him in the midst of all this. Blessings…
I am so very sorry that your little boy and the entire family is under seige and frightened as you also hold hope. All of you are on my prayer list.
Hi Mary. “Under siege.” Indeed – that’s exactly how it feels, and how it is. Thanks for your prayers. Thank goodness we are victorious in Christ. Pray that we experience Him in the midst of all this. Blessings…
I’m so sorry to hear about your son. Prayers for a full recovery. Peace to you and your family.
Thanks Johanna. We need those prayers. Blessings to you…
I’m so sorry to hear about your son. Prayers for a full recovery. Peace to you and your family.
Thanks Johanna. We need those prayers. Blessings to you…
I’m so sorry to hear about your son. Prayers for a full recovery. Peace to you and your family.
Thanks Johanna. We need those prayers. Blessings to you…
Gary i know this has to be tough on a dad to watch his son go thru pain and suffering. I want you you to know that I am praying for you and Aaron and your wife and the rest of the family and the medical team and staff taking care of him. where can I send cards to cheer this little fellow up and to you to encourage you. Bless your heart you have been here for us. we are here for you now as well. keep us posted. I know this was not how he wanted to start his school year for sure. but we are praying for complete healing of his body in the name of Jesus.
Hi Marcy. Thank you for your kind words. We are so grateful for your prayers and concern. Praying for you too…
Gary i know this has to be tough on a dad to watch his son go thru pain and suffering. I want you you to know that I am praying for you and Aaron and your wife and the rest of the family and the medical team and staff taking care of him. where can I send cards to cheer this little fellow up and to you to encourage you. Bless your heart you have been here for us. we are here for you now as well. keep us posted. I know this was not how he wanted to start his school year for sure. but we are praying for complete healing of his body in the name of Jesus.
Hi Marcy. Thank you for your kind words. We are so grateful for your prayers and concern. Praying for you too…
Gary i know this has to be tough on a dad to watch his son go thru pain and suffering. I want you you to know that I am praying for you and Aaron and your wife and the rest of the family and the medical team and staff taking care of him. where can I send cards to cheer this little fellow up and to you to encourage you. Bless your heart you have been here for us. we are here for you now as well. keep us posted. I know this was not how he wanted to start his school year for sure. but we are praying for complete healing of his body in the name of Jesus.
Hi Marcy. Thank you for your kind words. We are so grateful for your prayers and concern. Praying for you too…